More Sex Helps
a man doesn't have regular sex, or long periods of time
elapse between intercourse, he's likely to be too keen
and will ejaculate very quickiy after arousal.
2. Sex Without Emotional Commitment
men say that they can go longer if they're having sex
with a stranger because there's no emotional investment
and it doesn't matter if they 'fail'. This does seem
to vary among sufferers though, as some guys perform
better generally if they're with a partner they care
Varying The Position
missionary position seems to be about the worst when
it comes to setting off ejaculation. Many couples report
that when the woman is on top the PE sufferer can go
longer because he's doesn't have to thrust. He can lie
more passively so there's not as much likelihood of
an early climax brought on by movement.
apparently works better because the sufferer hasn't
got time to get anxious or over-eager. So, first thing
in the morning, in the middle of the night or any other
time when the urge comes on and there's little time
for planning or worrying, PE is less likely to occur.
Positive Mental Attitude (PMA)
relaxed and confident is vital. Deep breathing or even
meditation before love-making will give the PE sufferer
a calmer approach and avert ideas of failure or performance
anxiety. In our society, males have a lot of pressure
on them to perform sexually. Again, if we took the emphasis
off intercourse as being the main sexual activity between
couples, both men and women would be able to participate
more freely and pleasurably, enjoying sensuality as
much as sexuality. The old 'in-out' is only one way
to go and it's a mistake to think of intercourse as
the be-all-and-end-all. It's that kind of attitude that
causes PE in the first place.
mind is a powerful tool and can affect us positively
or negatively. If you realise that a 'wrong' idea is
causing a problem in your life, it's a good idea to
root it out and lose it once and for all. It's also
a grave mistake to let ego get tangled up with the way
you view yourself and your interactions with others.
Whether or not you can get an erection and maintain
it, whether or not you have a large penis and whether
or not you have had many lovers, are irrelevant to whether
or not you're a valuable person. It's important to keep
these notions separate.
If you think you're going to fail and you allow fear
to control you, you almost certainly will bring on the
very condition you dread.
Help From A Partner
lot of marriages break up because of unsatisfactory
sexual relations and they are the main cause of infidelity.
Therefore, a partner's attitude is vital to the improvement
of any sexual dysfunction. Women can help by being sympathetic
and never patronising or criticising.
as a couple, they should discuss what can be done —
for instance, trying different positions and monitoring,
over a period, factors that help and those that hinder.
alternative ways for the woman to be satisfied is an
important exercise so that her frustration doesn't become
another factor of resentment in the marriage. Direct
clitoral stimulation with hand, mouth or vibrator is
a very enjoyable addition to the foreplay repertoire
of a couple. Where there is an incidence of PE, this
becomes especially relevant. If a PE sufferer gives
his partner an orgasm manually before intercourse, it
doesn't matter quite so much if he's quick off the mark
as she's already been satisfied. Should she still prefer
to achieve an orgasm during intercourse, this will be
a lot easier if she has had adequate foreplay and is
just on the verge of climax.
I'd like to think that no guys just 'jump on' these
days but it certainly would be most inadvisable for
any male with PE to do it. One of my female listeners
rang up with a short and pointed message to males regarding
foreplay — do it!
the first stage, the woman manipulates the penis to
coax orgasm. As soon as the man thinks he's getting
close, she squeezes the penis between fingers and thumb,
where the head meets the shaft. A quick, firm squeeze
lasting a few seconds is required. She then relaxes
the penis and, after a short rest, the procedure begins
again. Timing is vital, as, once the man ejaculates,
it may be a long time before he can get erect again
and therefore, no more practice can occur. As you can
imagine, this technique takes time and patience. It
is usually recommended that it be continued for a week,
during which time there should be no penis-vagina contact.
technique is known as the 'stop-start'. This is also
time consuming but not as taxing on the woman. The penis
is inserted into the vagina very slowly and then rests
still inside for a few seconds before thrusting. Only
one in-out movement should be undertaken before another
rest and so on. If just entering the vagina brings ejaculation
close, the man should withdraw immediately. This exercise
should continue for at least 15 minutes and the aim
is to make as many thrusting movements as possible in
that time without climax.
sum up, all sexual dysfunctions benefit from a more
relaxed attitude and taking the focus off genital contact.
For example, couples could begin all love-making sessions
with a period of non-sexual interaction which brings
them closer and reduces anxiety.